Jenny: I’m a Cancer. I like long walks on the beach. I’m 24-years-old, I’ll be 25 in two months.

Sam: And you’re in school?
J: I’m a graduate student at Otis Academy School of Design.
S: You’re a grad student?

J: Yes. Ask me anything you want to know about art, I will let you know.
S: Art history?
J: No, just fine art, but I know a lot about art. I’m really smart. Yeah, don’t let my shenanigans surprise you; I’m really smart.

S: You’re smart?
J: Yes, totally. I have a bachelor’s degree. I went to Loyola Marymount University for undergraduate.

S: That’s where I first heard you. When I first moved to Los Angeles, I turned on the radio and I thought, “Wow, that girl sounds, nice.”
J: I used to be a DJ at KXLU. I used to be the program director for a year. After that, I took a year off, partied my ass off, and then I buckled down and went back to graduate school.

S: What’s your art like?
J: I do photography. I’ll be a master. Don’t let the hot rock exterior fool you. I’m a master.

S: Do you have plans, Jenny?
J: See, that’s the horrible thing. Don’t ask me what I’m going to do when I graduate because I really don’t know. I’ll probably be in the band and be poor. I’ll be living in Wade’s living room.

S: When did you start up the band? Let’s take it back.
J: About three years ago. I was living…

S: Can I have a drag of your cigarette?
J: Sure, do you want one?

S: I don’t smoke.
J: Just finish this one–go ahead…Fling it into the street. Three years ago we got together, and we formed The Orphans.

S: Why?
J: Because we were bored. We had nothing else to do, and we had instruments left over from a previous band.

S: You played in bands prior to this then?
J: Yeah, in high school, in Omaha. I’ve always been a guitar player, though. This is the first band I’ve ever not played an instrument in. It’s really weird.

S: I was born in Lincoln.
J: Are you shitting me! Serious? Look at my belt buckle: “Made in Nebraska”. Yep, from Omaha. I moved to LA when I was 17.
(Andy saunters up.)

Andy: I don’t know what all the wait was about, I couldn’t bring my drink outside anyway.
J: It’s cool. We’re doing it now. I’m the only Orphan you get.

S: (to Andy) You waited for drinks and then couldn’t bring them out?

A: (to Sam) I’m sorry… Let’s go on about how we just argued [inside about starting the interview].

S: Cause I was out here and…
(unintelligible arguing and laughing. Jenny impatiently saying “ok, ok, ok.”)

A: This is how our interviews go. Don’t worry it’s going to be super interesting. Jenny, have you ever seen the magazine before?
J: No, I haven’t. Someone was supposed to send us a copy. I think you probably sent it to our drummer’s house, that’s the address on our website.

S: Does he read?
J: He doesn’t read, no. Brandon has not learned how to read yet.

A: So, what should we talk about Jenny?
J: I don’t know, dude. Ask me questions. I’m ready to fucking rock.

A: That’s the thing–we’re not really good at asking questions.
J: Can I ask you questions?

S: Yes, God, yes.
J: What the hell are you guys doing?

S: We’re making a magazine!
J: Why are you making a magazine.

A: Well, Skratch, for instance, do you read it?
J: No.

A: It’s so fucking boring; it’s boring as shit.

S: Have you been in it?
J: They interviewed my drummer, and they put a picture in. And I wasn’t in the picture because I took the picture. I’m all, “Dude am I in the band anymore?”

A: Oh shit, we were supposed to take pictures [during the show].
J: It’s ok, I have a Polaroid camera in the car. You can just take a picture of me. Actually, just do that. They’ll be so fucking pissed…Can I ask you guys a question? Does art have to be socially responsible?
(Pensive pause)

A: No. Especially what we’re doing.

S: It only has to be responsible to whomever is making it…

A/S: (Back and forth blabbering)
J: Hey, let me ask you another question?

A: You’re totally bored shitless with us…
J: No, I’m not…Can punk rock change the world?

A: Yeah…

S: Do you think it can?
J: Yeah…

S: Nooooooo, it can’t. It would have already. Maybe it already did…

A: …It totally did…
J: Keep going. I’m done asking you questions. Ask me questions.

S: (Points to Jenny’s face) Is that glitter?
J: Probably, yeah, and I love wearing Ruby Woo MAC lipstick.

Wade: (walking past) Zeke is the greatest band of fucking all time.

J: Ask me questions. Come on dudes.
A: Can we just make up stuff and you can okay it later?
J: No, come on, ask me questions.

A: We were supposed to be all trashed for this, and we’re not trashed.
J: You look pretty trashed.

S: We wanted to come down to Long Beach…(whining)…Why couldn’t we?
J: Because we’re never in the same place at the same time. We’re so unorganized.

S: But we’re just interviewing you anyway.
J: You guys live up here; isn’t this easiest for you?

A: We’re all about fucking goofy photos and shit.
J: You’ll get the same answers if you come to Long Beach, or whether you’re in Hollywood.

A: Can we just fight a bunch I [like ‘argue’ fighting]?
Laughter

J: Yeah. Dude, this is the best interview I’ve ever done.

A: Why are you rolling your eyes?
J: I’m not rolling my eyes.

A: Make us believe it then.
J: (monotone) This is the best interview I’ve ever done. It was better than Cats. I want to do it again and again and again.
Laughter

A: Can I explain what were all about?

J: (pointing at Andy) Do you remember when we played with The Dickies? Did you get sick? Everyone in my band got sick. And it was from John, from your band, gave us all fucking SARS.

A: I don’t think I got sick, but I was looking at my bass the whole time (plays air bass really nerdy, as if that would guard him from germs), I don’t know how the fuck to play any music.
J: I know. We all got the flu because I used John’s microphone. Wade used the microphone. We were like, “What if Leonard from The Dickies got sick? Dude, he’s so old he’d totally die.” (laughter) I was so sick; I actually went to the emergency room in Long Beach. They were like, “Have you recently been to China?” I was like, “No, I played a show with The Dickies!”
Laughter

A: I was drunk.
J: That’s probably what killed the infection.

A: No, Ritchie fell on my leg and I got a hyper extended leg.
J: (sacastic) Oooh..

A: But my knee still hurts. Your fucking SARS is gone, but my knee still hurts.
J: (sarcastic again) Oh, look I got a trick knee from playing with The Dickies.
(Andy gets sad and mumbles some stuff.)

J: I’m just kidding. I’m sorry.

S: Hey, Ryan [the intern], ask a question. (to Jenny) He’s here to learn how to interview.
J: Well you shouldn’t be learning from these guys; they don’t know their ass from a hole in the ground.

Ryan: (voice cracking) So, ummm, so how did your parents get killed?
J: We all have parents. It’s all a farce. We just do it for a laugh; we do it for publicity.

R: Let me tell you, one time, me and my dad were out on a lake and I fell in the water. We didn’t have life vests on, and so my Dad jumped in to save me and, uh, it was only three feet deep and he hit his head on the bottom, and he almost died. But he saved me.
J: What does that have to do with my band?

R: Well the way I see it, rock [music] has fallen in the water and you guys are diving in to save it.

A: Your shows are so fun, but the crowds aren’t too into it.
J: I know…LA. LA audiences aren’t into it. I swear to God, we do so much better in, like, San Francisco. People freak out. People here are so jaded that they just stand there. Seriously we should move to San Francisco. This is the problem. Let me tell you, it’s because we’re a punk rock band, that’s it. Like we don’t have cool haircuts. We don’t have a look; we’re just punk rock. I think, in LA, there’s a problem with that–you have to have a look. You have to be hip; you have to be in the moment. We’re just a punk rock band, and right now, that’s not hip. So that’s why people just stand and stare at us like we’re retards.

S: Who do you like out here?
J: Like what bands?

A: No, actually, who do you have a crush on? That’s more interesting.
J: My heart belongs to a boring New York.
[It seriously sounded like she said that. We only meant to razz in good fun.]

A: HAHA, a boring New York.
J: A BOY IN New York City. But the bands that I love out here: The Stitches, The Distractions, The Starvations, The Checkers, Rolling Blackouts…Party Band R.I.P.

A: We had a good go, though, for like three weeks.
J: You guys rocked. R.I.P. Party Band.

A: What about in Long Beach, do your shows go over well there?
J: Yeah, because we’re from Long Beach; it’s like playing at home. People freak out. We play The Prospector and it’s like we got in a time machine, and it’s CBGB’s 1976. Everyone is into it, and everyone’s supportive, and everyone’s our friends.

A: Have you guys played the Midwest?
J: No. Hopefully in September when we go on tour, we’ll play in the Midwest. The only people that will be at the show will be all the women in my mom’s office, because she makes them listen to The Orphans album every morning. She’s the boss and she can basically make them do anything.
(Lots of mumbling. I think we’re yelling at cars or talking to other people.)

J: So ask me more questions.

S: That was pretty good actually, for us. So you just talked shit about LA.
J: No, I love LA. It’s been my home for seven years. But when it comes down to it, it’s an industry town. People are about looks; people are about image. That’s what it’s all about. But don’t get me wrong, I still love LA. It’s still my home. I can’t see myself anywhere else. I’ll stay in LA as long as LA wants me to stay here.

A: Until you get the key to the city. Do you guys tour a lot?
J: Every once in a while. We play up North: San Francisco a lot, Vegas a lot.

A: You haven’t been playing many shows lately, right?
J: Well, we’re not one of those bands that play at the opening of a Grocery Barn. At the beginning we did that a lot. But you gotta space it out, you know? You gotta make people want to see you. If you play every week no one is going to want to see you. You gotta keep the mystery up; you gotta keep things fresh. I wouldn’t want to play a show every week. I would get bored of The Orphans.

S: Will you talk some shit about your band members?
J: No; I love everyone in my band. I will not talk shit.

A: Gossip?
J: I have no gossip. Honestly, we’re one of the most normal…

S: Oh, come on. Some of their girlfriends are, like, total…
J: NO. I love everybody. We’re the most normal, nice people you’ll every meet. That’s a big misconception about us. That we’re like this crazy, fucking party whatever…Seriously, not at all.

S: I’m not buying it.

A: You’re not looking the tape recorder in the eyes.
J: I can’t talk shit because I have no shit. We just like to play music, and that’s what we do.

R: I’m buying one shots; you guys want anything?
(Lots of confusion and mummbling. We finally figure out that he’s talking about little bottles of booze.)

S: Oh! Well, you have to ask a question before going.
J: Ask me a question.

R: When you guys played in San Francisco there was this guy that was really annoying…
J: When was this?

R: Um…
J: There were lots of annoying people at those shows.

R: Right…um…um…
J: Actually the more annoying people are, the more pumped up I get. The more patronizing I get. If someone is being super annoying, I just want to fuck with them.

R: Have you ever thrown anything off stage?
J: Besides myself, No.

R: So, is Wild Turkey cool?
J: Yeah, Wild Turkey…Oh, well, on Thanksgiving, cause I’m a vegetarian. Are you guys done?

A: No.
J: Oh shit.

S: What are you doing later tonight, Jenny?
J: I’m going home and going to sleep because I have to work tomorrow morning.

A: Can we fancy this up later through email?
(Jenny nods)

A: Can you say that into the recorder.
J: Yeah, fancy it up later.

A: Just keep in mind that this was done goodheartedly.

S: So, goodhearted Andy was wondering why he had to pay to get in the show.
J: Miss Jenny is done with the interview, thank you and goodnight.