Social Scene
An "Ex"cuse to Mingle

Wynn recently broke up with her boyfriend. She came to Fran to begin healing and dish some dirt on her ex. She's back on the singles scene. Interested? Send her an email to personals@franmagazine.com. Don't be a shithead, though.

Wynn lives in Chicago, where she makes sure important packages get to important places. Her favorite food is tacos. Her favorite movie is What's Eating Gilbert Grape. Her favorite vacation ever was to the boundary waters of Minnesota.


So, what happened with you and Ryan? I totally thought you guys were going to get married.
No, no, no. Nothing that serious. It was a rebound relationship for both of us.

Were you both rebounding from shitty relationships?
Mine had been good, but he moved. Ryan's was shitty.

How'd you and Ryan meet?
At a party. I was complaining about being sad that my boyfriend moved, to a friend of mine. Ryan overheard it and said my ex was an asshole for leaving me. He was really wasted and proceeded to hit on me really, REALLY horribly. He made an ass of himself until his friend made him leave. Then I ran into him at another party like a week later. He didn't remember anything from the week before. Then we made out.

Why?
What do you mean, why?

I don't know. I just thought that was a funny thing to ask. Was this breakup a difficult one?
Sort of. We generally got along really well, but neither of us really wanted to be in a relationship. But, you know, that stuff's hard to talk about because you never know how the other person really feels about things. We both liked each other a lot and didn't want to hurt each other's feelings. So, one night we got a little drunk and had some of his prescription pain pills, and I figured it was the ideal time to bring it up. I pretty much just said, “Okay, we're going to have a relationship talk. And we're going to talk to each other as if we were talking about each other to friends. No bullshit. No worrying about hurt feelings.” And I was like, “I know we really like each other a lot, and hanging out is really fun, but we're kinda to the point where we need to decide to become really serious or probably just end it.” I was like, “I don't want to keep it casual, then hear about you sleeping with other girls. But, then, I don't really want to be in a serious relationship either.” He agreed. And it was amicable but hard because we miss each other.

Wow, that's some beautiful communication.
I know. Some adult shit, right?

Which of you had slept with more people before you dated? Did that ever come up?
No, it never came up. I'm not sure. Probably pretty equal.

I hate it when these interviews go like this. You're supposed to be all pissed and out to make a fool of him.
Nah, he's a good guy.

Marriage material?
Some day, maybe.

Jesus, you've got to at least say something that'll embarrass him.
Yeah, I know. I've got that prepared... (laughs) ...He makes the goofiest face when we're having sex. Like some big demented, weird toothy grin. It freaked me out at first, like I was getting fucked by a retard, but I learned to like it.

Whoa, was that present tense? Are you guys still “doing it”?
Whoops, no... I meant “used to”.

So, from the looks of things, you're not really even looking to get into another relationship. Why do the interview then?
I don't know. I think it's a funny idea. I still like boys. I just don't want to be tied down to one of them.

Fair enough. What are you looking for in a man?
Someone that dresses like an old-timey professor and has gay little quips about everything.

Do you like nice buns?
Yeah.